‘Who could love you, you are not good enough’…’You’re not worthy’…’You don’t deserve to be loved and live the life of your dreams’
Ever had a sneaky b*tch on your shoulder saying something similar to this!?
Well that my friends is your ‘mean girl’ and you’re about to meet the little lady who knows how to master her!
Cue the life of your dreams and limitless possibility!
Sound tasty!? Well read on for my interview with the divine Miss Melissa Ambrossini
Faye: Firstly my lovely, tell us a little bit about yourself and what you do? And of course WHY you do what you do?
Mel: I am an author, speaker and self-love teacher. And the short answer is that I do what I do because I love it!
Faye: ‘Necessity is the mother of all invention’ I always say that my dream job didn’t exist, I had to create and it came out of me 100% living the ethos of what I do now with Fashion Hound (It just took me a while to figure out it was right under my nose!) Was it a similar journey for you uncovering your passion and life’s work?
Mel: Absolutely! I was just saying to my husband the other day that I literally created my dream job. It’s the most empowering way to live, and the best thing is that everyone can do it. (Seriously.) You just have to master your inner Mean Girl and have the courage to follow your heart. In fact, this approach is so game-changing that there’s a whole chapter in my book dedicated to the ‘work’ you do and how following your passion is the key to happiness.
Faye: One of my favorite Deepak Chopra sound bites is ‘Always ask yourself how may I serve’…I truly believe our work should be of service, add value, help others, It’s such a joyous feeling and you must see this play out on a daily basis for you!?
Mel: Every day I am literally brought to my knees over the stories I hear — Women who have left toxic relationships, started their dream businesses, healed from serious health issues, drawn in the soul-mate of their dreams, and who’ve finally figured out how to master their Mean Girls. These incredible women are why I do what I do. Their commitment to honouring their truth and facing their fears absolutely blows me away. I believe we are here to be of service to the world, so if I can play some small part in their journey, I am content.
Faye: When I heard you talk about our ‘Mean Girl’ that was a definite light bulb moment for me, I was like…’wow, what a sneaky b*tch’ Talk us through her wicked ways…
Mel: Your Mean Girl is that fear based voice inside your head that tells you you’re not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough, whatever enough! She’s there to protect you — she doesn’t want you to stray outside your comfort zone, ‘cos you might get hurt. So she makes sure you’re always scared and fearful and on the lookout for danger. Unfortunately, though, if we listen to her fear-based whispers we never end up following our dreams or finding inner peace and happiness. Instead, we just beat ourselves up a lot and feel like crap. This was how I lived for a verrrry long time, but luckily, there IS another way.
Faye: SUPER exciting….you have a new book based around side hooking our Mean Girl!! I feel like this is going to be a total game changer for a lot of women, I’m reading it right now and already so connected to it, thank you! Can you give us a snapshot.
Game-changer is right. I almost can’t even fully describe how different my life is now (after learning to master my Mean Girl) compared to what it was before, when I was renting the penthouse in Fear Town and spent my days feeling inadequate and powerless. It’s seriously like chalk and (raw cashew) cheese. The book pretty much flowed right out of me — it’s the roadmap I wish I’d had all those years ago when my Mean Girl ruled the show and my life was falling apart. It’s a mixture of personal stories and insights, massive ‘aha’ moments, and practical (and powerful) action steps to help you make change. I hate when books don’t give you actual actionable strategies, so I wanted this baby to be as constructive and useful as possible. I’m so incredibly proud of the way it’s come together, and can’t wait for women to get their hands on it and experience the power of mastering their Mean Girl for themselves
Faye: Dream chasing/Entrepreneurialism can be a tough game, so what are your top 3 tips for beating that Mean Girl and blasting off towards your dream job/life/love?
Mel: Mastering your Mean Girl is an essential (but often forgotten) step when it comes to kicking ass in your business or career.
My top 3 tips are:
- Practice awareness. Pay attention to the words your Mean Girl is whispering in your ear about why you shouldn’t follow your dreams. It could be anything — You’ll never get that raise. You don’t have enough experience to start your own business. You could never make money as a coach/ consultant/ blogger. Become aware of what she’s whispering — awareness is the first essential step.
- Gently close the door on her. Don’t try to argue with her, or start an inner war — that’ll just cause you a whole lot of angst. Simply make the decision to turn the volume down on what she’s saying and gently close the door on her.
- Choose to live from a place of love instead. When it comes to your career or business, tune back in to the passion that pumps your pulse. Use that spark to light your way, instead of allowing fear to rule your decisions.
This process isn’t something you can do once and then forget about — it’s a practice you have to commit to daily. But I promise that when you live your life this way, you’ll start achieving goals and dreams that previously seemed impossible. It all starts with getting up close and personal with your Mean Girl.
Faye: You are so mindful in your life and work…and I know mindful fashion resonates with you too, so share with us your thoughts on sustainable and conscious style.
Mel: Sustainability is something I am super passionate about. Don’t get me wrong, I still love my designer handbag! But no longer do material objects fulfill me; they are simply nice things I like to enjoy. I don’t need them, but they are fun. And every time I hand over my money for something, I make sure I really need it. I make sure it’s coming from a place of love and not fear. Again, I go into depth about this in my book, but money is energy and every time you are handing it over you are voting with your dollar. You are saying that you believe in that product or company you are buying from. So it’s important to think about where you’re sending and spending that energy.
Faye: Do you believe that fashion and what we wear plays a huge part in how we feel, hold ourselves and connect with the world?
Mel: How we dress is an expression of us. I see it like art. I love to get creative with it, but I also have a very simple style. Most often, you’ll find me in jeans and a tee, because that’s my vibe — casual, comfortable and relaxed.
Faye: What are you dreaming about for the future gorgeous girl!?
Mel: To be honest, I am just focusing on being present and enjoying this magical moment right in front of me. It’s my favourite way to live 🙂
Want to read Mel’s book? Um yeah for shiz you do and PS she’s got some great deals happening to celebrate the launch. Head to Mel’s website to grab yourself a copy and get to